PRESS RESET – 6 Tips for Successfully Resetting your Life
Have you ever had to reset your television or cable remote when it had gone out-of-whack? When you reset something, you fix it, adjust it, or start it over. Over the years there have been many times I had to press the reset button on my life.
When I failed my driving test the first time, I was disappointed, but just took the test again. When I failed it a second time, I was devastated. I felt I was a complete failure and a disappointment, and that I was wasting my parents’ money on driving lessons. I went home bawling to the point my family was alarmed and thought something major had happened to me. I could not imagine failing twice, and felt like the world had come to an end. With some encouragement and perspective from my family, I pressed the reset button and took the test again.
Fast forward to university when I failed Accounting not once, but twice and it meant I would have to do an extra year of university. Again, I felt like a complete failure, but nevertheless, I pressed reset and this time passed the supplemental exams required to go on to the next year.
Fast forward to my final year of university when I became pregnant shortly before final exams. That was NOT the plan. I expected to finish my degree, return to my parents’ home, get a good job, get married, move into my own home, and have children. In that order!!! So once again I pressed reset. I successfully completed my exams, had my baby, migrated from Trinidad to Jamaica, got married and settled into married life, motherhood, and a career…. In that order.
No. This is not the part where I lived happily ever after. It seemed like it would be for a while. I was happy in my marriage, we had two more children, and we were all doing well. Then came a major blow. A mysterious and debilitating illness assailed our family. I say family because although only one of us was actually ill, we were all deeply and terribly affected. Devastated, confused, and frustrated by months and then years of futile searching for the cause and a medical solution, I experienced anguish, fear, disappointment and grief like I never had before.
Our new normal (sound familiar?) involved countless doctor and therapy visits, and a myriad of different medications, none of which was proving e ffective until recently. Then there was the periodic and continuous interruption of school attendance over the years, stymieing plans for a particular career path.
Again, this was NOT the plan. The plan was for all three (3) children to move from High School to University to lucrative jobs and independence, smoothly and uneventfully. But I kept pressing that reset button. I made the necessary adjustments as we carried on with our lives to the best of our abilities. I never gave up.
It would be a while before I would accept that the way I had envisioned our lives going was never going to be, but that it was not, however, the end of the world. Our reset life looks pretty good right now. My two older children have graduated from university and are working in lucrative jobs, and my last is currently in university.
There have been many more times that I have had to press reset, and there will be more. It was not easy, but I did it. Maybe you too have had to press that reset button, or maybe not yet. It is my wish that when that time comes, as it will, that by sharing the following six (6) tips I learnt along the way, sometimes after the fact; when trouble comes, you would be READY to RESET and GO!!!
Love never fails and where there is a will there is a way. Love believes all things. Never stop searching for answers – research, ask questions, change course if you need to (e.g. change doctors), never give up and never lose hope. (Corinthians 13:4-8)
Seek God’s help and trust Him to help. God is a very present help in time of trouble. When we could not find answers, I cried out to God and trusted Him to help us one way or the other. He gave us wisdom and strength and provided the means to take care of our needs. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)
Seek and/or accept the help and support of family and close friends. In time of illness, classmates, other parents, teachers, extended family members, and close friends were amazingly and invaluably encouraging, helpful and supportive. We could not have made it without them. (Proverbs 17:17)
Remain united with, and be kind to your loved ones…and yourself. In times of crisis remember that you are not each other’s enemies. Be sensitive to each family member’s needs, and support each other. Work as a team and utilize each other’s strengths and abilities to complement each other. Keep the common goal always before you. Blame and guilt does not help. Instead it distracts you and blinds you to what is important, and to possibilities.
Do not put your life on hold. Stop holding your breath, waiting for, and looking toward the day when everything would be “ok”. Stop pressing pause. Press reset. LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST RIGHT NOW. Do not keep focusing on the negatives, and what should have been or might be. Right in the middle of the crisis, reset your expectations and enjoy what is good NOW.
See the good in everything. Be thankful. It helps significantly that I am always able to see the hand of God in everything - how He preserved us from worse outcomes, provided the right people at the right times, and gave discernment that only He could give at some critical times. Recognizing and being thankful for the good, helps me to remember that God is with me and never leaves me and that He has given me all I need for life and godliness.
Join me and other women as together we learn how to reset our lives in my ‘Recharge and Reset Course: Maximize Your Potential, Fulfill Your Purpose’ online course. Click here for more information and to register.